Death in the Middle

Scotty (James Doohan) died Wednesday. Dozens died in London on 7/7 and thousands die every day.

A coworker's very close aunt passed last Friday. A good friend of mine's mom passed last night. Very sad. She had serious problems in December 2003 and no one thought she'd make it then, so her family and friends have had a year and a half of good and not-so-good times, but there are memories that were made.

I could write a poem, or a haiku, or editorialize on the worth of a life. I didn't know her mom, except from what my friend told me and everyone else. I kind of regret not meeting her at some point, but it wasn't my world, or my place. Not pretending to be magnanimous or anything, just observing a fact.

I'm always an outsider. Even with my own family, I've always felt that way. The whole ennui thing, y'know. There are my friends whom I've felt more at home with than anyone, and still, I feel that way. Maybe we all do.

My point?

We are not what we think we are. We are not the centers of our universe, even though it always feels that way - that things revolve around us. It's the connections that matter, the memories, the things we touch, the stuff we leave behind. Regardless of how we see ourselves, regardless of how we feel inside, it's the perceptions of others that determine how we are remembered. Whether through good or ill intentions, cross or alike purposes, our comrades, our families, our acquaintances, those individuals whose lives we touch in a single moment, these are the ways we affect the world, the ways we pass on our legacies.

I can be a cold sonofabitch, or the warmest person in the world, it all depends on who I interact with. I'm a hypocrite, a liar, a lover, a friend, honest, sometimes wise, many times a fool, and never as smart as I think I am. But all of these things, unless they are remembered, unless they are kept by others, don't matter a hill of beans in the end.

She loved her mom, is a strong person, a giving heart, and a great person to be around. The way she felt and talked about her mom and her dad, her mother will be remembered well for a long time.

Such an intangible thing, these impressions and memories. A memory can be as fleeting as the blue car passed yesterday evening, or as lasting as the last kiss from your first true love.

But in the end, that's all we are. Make them worth it, and live forever.

TTFN

Palm Coast Marineland Statue....

I was visiting with Mandy (girl I'm currently talking to) and we were driving around seeing what there was to see in the small village of Palm Coast. It was damaged a while back by wildfires, and presumably was lashed a good bit by the 'canes last year (ie. beyond shopping areas and country clubs, basically nothing).

So, I'm driving with her down A1A, past beach houses, and everything, and come across this statue near Marineland just south of St. Johns County. It's completely overgrown and the marble is turning green from exposure, and there is only rubble and what used to be a parking lot there. So I stopped to take a picture, not knowing if I'll ever purposefully see it again.

Beautiful and poignant, is there anything he represents? Was this a statue of Poseidon, Lord of the Sea at an entrance to the now closed park? A shepherd with no flock... standing and facing the ground, thinking on past glories...

Dunno.

TTFN

World of Warcraft

This is just about the most ass-kickingest MMORPG (Massively Multiplayer Online Role-Playing Game) out there. I used to play Dark Age of Camelot (Link) but it got old, boring, and I love Blizzard's previous products - WarCraft I-III, StarCraft, Diablo, Diablo II and their expansion packs - so I waited and waited. Been playing it since it came out, off and on... gave it up for a while whilst I paid attention to more worthwhile things.

But if anyone reads my blog and plays - I'm on Boulderfist, name of Czernobog, guild of Draconis Lumenis.

Enjoy.

TTFN

George Romero's Land of the Dead

Well, not great, as some of the critics write. It is nice to watch, good to see the innovation in zombie movie FX that is so apparent. But it's another small-scale movie, not epic in grandeur, not even a character study really. The relevance to modern life is obvious, the politics of the film practically see-through.

So I wasn't overwhelmed - it was about what I expected. Will have some appeal to some, lots of appeal to others, and absolutely none to most I imagine.

TTFN

Firefly

This is absolutely one of the best written shows that never made it on TV.
Damn FOX. Damn them.

Here's an article on the Cultural Gutter about it.

TTFN

Beach this morning 

Beach this morning